Will You Press The Button?

CryptoMynd6 months ago

I wish the two boxes, separated by the word 'but', of the reality-altering button I just pressed, were retroactively written as described below. The top box, which was previously read, "You may make any wish you want, the amount of wishes is unlimited.", n...[Show full comment]

vert3437 years ago

Wish #1: The Downside of the Button I Pushed to Gain Infinite Wishes is COMPLETELY negated and cannot come back EVER, thereby my wishes cannot be turned evil or against me by ANY force of god, nature, man or any other possible entity.

NotTheProtagonist2 years ago

Wish granted. The downside becomes “you gain infinite wishes” and is immediately negated, meaning you lose an infinite number of wishes.

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Sntcringe8 years ago

Wish #1: I wish that every wish I make after this wish will be granted to my intended result with no adverse side effects for me, my family or any other person in the universe, up to and including animals and aliens. Wish 2: A monkey butler

NotTheProtagonist2 years ago

Wish granted. Your intended use for all wishes, going forwards, is to screw yourself over.

Azrael Prizer12 years ago

wish #1: nothing i wish can be twisted into something bad

gooberman6 months ago

Granted: now every one of your wishes is now twisted (nothing you wish is twisted, only everything is)

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Monster57289 years ago

Wish: I wish every wish I make doesn't become twisted.

DOGOFORLIFE7 years ago

You wish for every wish you make do not become real?

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NIOIN8 years ago

I"d like to undo my last wish. Thx.

ThePaulDude3 years ago

Or better still just get rid of the downside.

Agent_Waffle6 years ago

A monkey"s claw isn't a thing, because of this typo, there is no downside. Probably the one time I will be thankful for grammar errors / autocorrect.

huskeyranger9 years ago

i wish for a day off work with no major inconvenience or disaster for it to happen in me and the rest of humanity's current shape, size and form.

NotTheProtagonist2 years ago

Wish granted. That day off comes from one of your sick/vacation days (assuming your place of work has those).

Seapony8 years ago

How are there any downsides? Just think carefully.

NotTheProtagonist2 years ago

@ThePaulDude Wish granted. None of your future wishes will come true.

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Timelypat8 years ago

1. Wish "I wish that when I make a wish, the wish I make doesn't need to be specific in order for the wish I make to be granted correctly." 2. "I wish for all the cookies in the world."

NS8 years ago

Just how much you like cookies Because I will wish to rob your cookies (*´∀`*)

Nathathan8 years ago

Wish 1#: Anything I wish can never be turned against me if I am not specific enough Wish 2# infinite money Wish 3# Portal gun, please Wish 4# Let me be able to travel dimensions

YouWillNeverBeThin8 years ago

i wish to get away from you morons

KingSimba9 years ago

My number 1 wish: I wish King Simba from The Lion King will come to life and not eat or harm me or anyone else and live with me.

Hottydgh9 years ago

My first wish would be that every wish including this one, is exactly how it is in my mind.

DOGOFORLIFE7 years ago

You wish for every wish you make to go into your mind?

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Garrett Brian Simmons12 years ago

The monkey's paw*

SeabassJames7 years ago

The monkey chain! The monkey fist! The monkey!

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Chris Larson12 years ago

I WISH FOR A LAWYER!

NotTheProtagonist2 years ago

@Quartzfire Hi, I’m the only lawyer from the reality I hail from, thereby making me the best in that reality, and I STILL lost every case I took part in.

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Brandon Hawkins12 years ago

Life would be boring if I could have anything I want instantly. Nothing to work towards,

Matthew Doraby12 years ago

you mean paw right?

abcx9 years ago

I would just have to define my wish really well.

TerraQuartZ9 years ago

like the wishmaster

TreyHumphrey7 years ago

Like Norm, from Fairly Odd Parents, Timmy wished for an omelette, the genie gave him a hot as fuck omelette, he (Timmy) should have said OMELETTE ON A PLATE.

Tanatsha Brosman12 years ago

The key word here is "may."

ReptilianFollower699 years ago

lol you can do an if statement and say "If this wish isn't followed EXACTLY as I say it will result in the wish not happening at all"

Piece_of_shit_6668 years ago

Fine with that I will just plan out how to word my wishes

Patrick Coogan12 years ago

Have a lawyer friend or become one, look at your wishes, carefully deconstructing them until they give you the power to do whatever you want, simple :D

Noriaki_Inou9 years ago

My first wish would be all of my wishes turning out exactly how I want them to with no catch 22. That way I don't have to be specific.

Noriaki_Inou9 years ago

And, I could also wish to retract my last wish if that didn't work for some odd reason.

CodeCraker8 years ago

I wish That that can't happen

Sansyboy0989 years ago

Just fu##ing wish you were the one making the wish

Little C9 years ago

*You become the monkey's paw*

smsff710 years ago

I limit how I use my wishes and I limit what they would do. Not hard to say I wish I won this contest without any suspicion of cheating or any other legal issues that might pop up.

jose20169 years ago

Wismichupapollas

Ur_avrg_reddit_user5 years ago

Whish 1: whish the jini/ wish granter can read ur mind so they know exactly what ur thinking & cannot twist ur wish.

Goku11 years ago

Hmmm... how about a wish that I will be completely immortal. I cannot die from anything, won't feel pain from anything, if I were to somehow lose parts of my body, (fingers, hands, arms, legs, toes, ears, nose, head etc) it'll regrow immediately looking 10...[Show full comment]

meowpeanutbutter8 years ago

Just wish that you don't have to be so specific about all your wishes.

NotTheProtagonist2 years ago

Wish granted. Nothing happens, because you didn’t have to be specific (at the cost of the wish getting twisted).

fazbear kid9 years ago

I wish for five nights at freddy's

NotTheProtagonist2 years ago

Wish granted. The game’s a romantic comedy.

RainbowAnimalzGirl9 years ago

But do we know we have to be specific

ReeledTiedBromasterBTH9 years ago

No I don't wanna die, get money, and come back to life and terrify my family

Gamerbro9 years ago

simple i wish for my bank account to have infinite money and after that wish i can no longer make more wishes so i dont have t0 be so specific all the time

Mea8 years ago

I watched the movie and read the book someone died because they wished for money

Cornelius_McMuffin3 years ago

First wish: I get to see the outcome of my wishes before I make them and then change them until I get the wish right.

_SlytherinROX10 years ago

I wish that you don't mess with my wishes in any way

Qtprincessamanda8 years ago

It"s called the monkeys PAW

LadyChaomii9 years ago

You don't HAVE to wish for anything, so it might be a good last resort ability.

MarciRose9 years ago

I wish that no wish granted to me from this point on, with no further lack of capability for wishs, can possibly have a negative outcome for me or anyone I know, in saying no bodily harm, transfiguration, bad luck or death will ensue after the making of said wish.

NotTheProtagonist2 years ago

Wish granted. No more wishes for you.

Ramisoboh7 years ago

Im vary talkitve

BossifulGamer42 9 years ago

I wish these wishes didn't have to be so specific

MaahSebastian8 years ago

Just be fuckin specific, guys! I wish, that none of my wishes, including this one, that i"m making right now, will be twisted and can not cause any harm to any human, animal, unless I wish for somebody or something to be harmed.

Jake Colonna12 years ago

Simple, simplify a wish until it can't possibly go wrong. The wish being that your wishes don't work however you like them to.

sterlingsilvernine9 years ago

The Monkey's Claw dosn't exist, its a paw.. so...

Dragonperson8 years ago

Wish #1: wish to have no twisting of your wishes

Ket King9 years ago

"I wish everything evolved in the natural, logical way it was meant to be, but i also get ____"

NotTheProtagonist2 years ago

…pancreatic cancer? Okay, knock yourself out.

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